day one in haiti

I am in love with this country. 


Actually, I am in love with the people here. 
We have been in Haiti for a little over 24 hours now, and I never want to leave. We are in a town close to the Port au Prince airport - I think it's called Delmas. Our hotel is so much nicer than I imagined! The "rooms" are really two story apartments with a kitchen, a sitting area, dining area, and upstairs has two bedrooms (each containing two double beds and an AC unit!), and we have a bathroom with a shower. Nice. 
Emma, Addie, Taylor and I are rooming together for the week. The other people on the trip are Kim, Eric, Matt, Austin, Caleb, Mary, and Sarah. There are also about 11 other people here with us from California. 
okay. 
So now about Zanfan. 
I don't even know where to begin. 
The love I already feel for this place makes me speechless. 
Today we arrived at the new Zanfon house and began to clean! We were mopping floors inside and out. I had fun prying to break the language barrier with the boys helping us. Who knew it could be so difficult to ask "what should we do next?" One boy in particular stuck out from the rest of the Zanfon boys. I later learned his name - Christalin. He is 12 years old and a born leader and servant. Anywhere work was being done (cleaning, painting, mealtime...) he would somehow know about it and he would be there, helping. serving. joygully. Putting EVERYONE before himself. He washed my hands for me. He would take my hand, lead me to their clean water, and literally wash my hands for me. His compassion is incredible. He was always by my side: holding my hand, hugging me, playing with my hair, or taking my hand and touching it to his face. I can't even explain how beautiful it is to have someone you have just met show you this kind of love. 

Christalin

The first hour of Zanfon (after mopping) was spent at the chalkboard - Christalin was teaching me Creole. He wrote my name (Ana) on the board with my age (22), then his name and age. He told me how to say both in Creole, among some other random words (chicken, bag). Later he would randomly quiz me on what he had taught. He would hug me, face in my belly, look up at me and say "I am your baby." He showed no sign of jealousy or territory when other kids would come hug me or play with me. He would just stand to the side, lovingly looking on at his friends and me play. Many times he would just silently sit there holding my hand. At one point, he was laying down with his head in my lap and Emma leaned over to me and said, "Is he calling you mom?" I looked down and realized that he was hugging himself with my arm while softly saying "Ma.... Ma..." oh. my soul. He speaks a little english, and I know a few phrases in Creole now. He asked me when I was going to go back to the United States and I said, "Sunday. Dimanche." "me, too. Christalin go back to les Etats Unis on Sunday. With you." He then buried his head in my shirt and said, "I love you." He held on. "I come with you? to the United States? Oui?" "I wish you could, Christalin." "no. take me with you. I come back with you." This may not seem like an unusual request, since we were at a house made up of a hundred Hatian orphans. However, a few little girls came up to me later andd said, "You need to take Christalin back with you. To the United States." "what?" "when you go back. You take Christalin to live with you." 


Christalin is an undocumented orphan. 
He will never be able to leave Haiti, let alone be able to "go home" with me, or any other family from the United States. 
He will be living in Haiti forever. 


My heart is breaking. 
My soul aches. 


The people and children here in Haiti are the most compassionate and servant hearted people I have ever met. Why on earth is it that these amazing people, like Christalin, will never have a place to call home besides an orphanage? Why can't he ever know what a mother's love feels like? It isn't htat they aren't well cared for at Zanfon. They hace places to sleep, food to eat, they even have an old xbox. But they don't have parents. They don't know what having and being a part of a family is like - outside of Zanfon. Why? How can we change this? How can Christalin have a mother? My heart is so heavy, but full. I know the Lord has a plan for these amazing people. 


Help me see it. 
Help me understand it. 
Help me be part of it. 


Help me. 


 Prayer Requests: 
Christalin (and all the children of Zanfon & Maison (the orphanage of documented kids) 
Our team's health the leaders from the California group are stuck in the dominic republic airport. pray that they can get here. 
 that the people of Haiti will see God's light through us.